New Book And Giveaway: The Gaggle Approach To Dating

It’s a question all of us single gals have asked at one time or another — where are all the single, available men? Well, what if your existing social circle held the answer to that question? This is the premise of The Gaggle: How the Guys You Know Will Help You Find the Love You Want (Simon & Schuster), a new book by Jessica Massa, co-creator of the acclaimed website WTF Is Up With My Love Life?!

Based on in-depth interviews with young women and men across the U.S., the book is a how-to guide for navigating your love life in what Massa describes as a “post-dating world.” It talks a lot about how technology has changed the dating landscape – and how the Gaggle concept can help women take charge of their romantic fate.

So what exactly is the gaggle? Massa and her best-friend-turned-business-partner Rebecca Wiegand coined the term to describe the collection of guys in every woman’s life.

“Your gaggle is the group of guys in your life who you might not be “dating,” but who play different roles, fulfill different needs, and help you to figure out who you are and what kind of guy and relationship you ultimately want,” says Massa. “These guys are all around you, once you open your eyes to them! There are ten types of guys who might be in your gaggle at any moment (click here for a list of all ten types).”

Massa adds that the gaggle approach is easy to adopt – it’s simply a matter of shifting how you think about the men you know, and the new men you’re meeting every day.

“Women don’t need to learn any tricks or memorize any rules,” she says. “They just need to start recognizing that all the ambiguous, not-quite-romantic-but-not-quite-platonic relationships that they have with men mean something.”

You can read an excerpt of The Gaggle here. Even better, I’ve got a copy to give away to one lucky Single Gal In The City reader! Post a comment below by Friday June 22nd and tell me what you think about the Gaggle concept, and you’ll be automatically entered to win!

Category: dating advice, dating bloggers, dating dos and don'ts | Tags: , , , 3 comments »

3 Responses to “New Book And Giveaway: The Gaggle Approach To Dating”

  1. Ann

    I read the excerpt and I think the author is on to something. Although I’m married now– I can remember feeling frustrated with my love life (or lack thereof) and wondering what the heck I was doing wrong. I didn’t get married till I was in my 30’s and was getting pretty sick of friends/relatives/smug marrieds trying to “help” by offering outdated advice or *shudder* trying to set me up on blind dates. I mean–there are worse things in life than not being in a relationship or married! When I finally did meet my husband, I guess he was part of my gaggle…I knew him for about 5 or 6 months before we actually started “dating.” He went from platonic friend to hot sex prospect/ego booster to boyfriend prospect to my husband in a little over 2 years. We’ve been married 5 years now, are expecting our first baby, and he’s still a hot sex prospect!

  2. Melissa

    Hi Melissa,
    Well as for the concept… reading their example of Gaggle I would say first off I only have about half of the ones they listed! (and it’s not like I don’t get out much but I guess most of my friend’s are married couples or single divorcees…not a lot of unattached men. But the little section of book (what I read through at work anyway) seemed relatable enough. :)

  3. Melissa

    Thanks for sharing Ann — I didn’t know that was the trajectory for you two! I couldn’t agree more about the plague of outdated advice, though I can’t say I shudder on the rare occasion a blind date is proposed. :) Melissa — I hear you about not having much of The Gaggle’s types. I only have two of the ten they list.


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