Category: NYC


By The Numbers: Married Or Not Edition

February 28th, 2009 — 6:35pm

I recently went to my first-ever engagement party. The bride to be is my first galpal here in New York to find Mr. Right — so the occasion got me to thinking about the role of geography in finding true love.

The Big Apple doesn’t rate highly in most surveys about top dating destinations

Most of my friends who have tied the knot are from smaller cities. Many surveys support the idea that New York is a challenging place to be a single. The Big Apple failed to make either of The Top 10 lists in a Sperling roundup of best and worst dating cities in the U.S. (for the record, Austin, Texas was the winner).

In my own social circle, I’ve definitely seen the effect that where you reside has on who you end up with. Here are some examples of this dynamic — By The Numbers:

Number of married girlfriends: 7
Number of married girlfriends who live in NY: 1
Number of single girlfriends: 13
Number of single girlfriends who live in NY: 11
Number of NY girlfriends in serious relationships: 2
Number of NY girlfriends who found love within days of moving back to the Midwest: 1

One of my best friends once asked if it has ever occurred to me that my soul mate isn’t in New York. The honest answer to that is no. And not just because I’ve been there and done the long distance thing, or because I’m not open to Mr. Right candidates outside of my zip code.

No, it’s for the simple reason that home is where my heart is. And I believe that even in a competitive dating marketplace like NYC, when your heart is truly in the search for happily ever after, eventually–statistical odds be damned–you’ll find it.

Comment » | best and worst dating cities in the U.S., engagement parties, finding Mr. Right, NYC, Sperling survey, The Big Apple

By The Numbers: Married Or Not Edition

February 28th, 2009 — 1:35pm

I recently went to my first-ever engagement party. The bride to be is my first galpal here in New York to find Mr. Right — so the occasion got me to thinking about the role of geography in finding true love.

The Big Apple doesn’t rate highly in most surveys about top dating destinations

Most of my friends who have tied the knot are from smaller cities. Many surveys support the idea that New York is a challenging place to be a single. The Big Apple failed to make either of The Top 10 lists in a Sperling roundup of best and worst dating cities in the U.S. (for the record, Austin, Texas was the winner).

In my own social circle, I’ve definitely seen the effect that where you reside has on who you end up with. Here are some examples of this dynamic — By The Numbers:

Number of married girlfriends: 7
Number of married girlfriends who live in NY: 1
Number of single girlfriends: 13
Number of single girlfriends who live in NY: 11
Number of NY girlfriends in serious relationships: 2
Number of NY girlfriends who found love within days of moving back to the Midwest: 1

One of my best friends once asked if it has ever occurred to me that my soul mate isn’t in New York. The honest answer to that is no. And not just because I’ve been there and done the long distance thing, or because I’m not open to Mr. Right candidates outside of my zip code.

No, it’s for the simple reason that home is where my heart is. And I believe that even in a competitive dating marketplace like NYC, when your heart is truly in the search for happily ever after, eventually–statistical odds be damned–you’ll find it.

Comment » | best and worst dating cities in the U.S., engagement parties, finding Mr. Right, NYC, Sperling survey, The Big Apple

Opening The Vault: Part Fifteen

November 15th, 2008 — 10:33pm
Whenever I have a conversation about my junior year abroad, I invariably find myself feeling more than a little nostalgic. My nine-month stint in London was one of the best times of my life — and one of the hardest experiences to part with.

Upon returning from London in the summer of ‘94, I had a bad case of reentry shock, the letdown that accompanies returning to your home country following a long absence. Not only was I longing for England’s capital but I was preoccupied by affairs of the heart, specifically my budding long-distance romance with California native Mark (a.k.a Sparky).

Summer 1994: It wasn’t all smiles when I returned to NYC after my year in London
Sparky was very much on my mind as I settled back into life as a New Yorker. Lacking the steady stream of male distractions that I had in London, I ended up dating Frank, a friend of my brother’s whose obsession with being vegan and self-help guru Tony Robbins did little to light my fire. But, as the saying goes, when you’re not near the one you love…

I now Open The Vault and take you back to July of ‘94.…

New York, NY
July 15, 1994

Dear Diary,

In 7 hours, I will join Frank in his hometown of Poughkeepsie for his sister’s wedding. I really do not want to go to this thing because I have no desire to pretend he’s Mr. Wonderful.

It just figures. He comes from a Norman Rockwell-esque family and he lives in the same city — but I’m not in love with him. When Frank and I first hooked up on New Year’s Eve, I fancied him. But back then, I was looking for a distraction from last summer’s crush and Frank fit the bill.


Since then, though, the excitement factor with Frank has diminished considerably. He’s all I’ve got here, though, so I feel like I might as well keep him around.


* * *


July 17, 1994


Spoke to Sparky a little while ago. It’s too bad he’s so far away. Meanwhile, Frank is getting on my last nerve. Then again, what can I expect from a man who order lasagna with no cheese?

* * *

July 30, 1994

I find myself getting irritated on a daily basis now with Mom and Dad. I didn’t have to deal with their comments, criticisms, etc. in London. I had so much freedom there. The kind of freedom that I wish with all my heart I could have again, especially this week. Because in just 9 short hours, I will be reunited with Sparky…

* * *

I was both excited and nervous about seeing Sparky. After our blissful week together in London, would we able to live up to the romantic precedent we’d set for ourselves? Would our chemistry be the same? Little did I know that many more complicated questions would arise when Sparky and I were finally face to face once again.

Comment » | junior year abroad, London, long-distance relationships, NYC, reentry shock

By The Numbers: You Never Know Edition

November 1st, 2008 — 12:18am

It’s often said that romance happens when you least expect it. Over the years, I’ve experienced this phenomenon many times.

From NYC’s overcrowded Lexington Avenue subway line to a summer stint as a receptionist, there’s been no shortage of variety when it comes to how I’ve connected with the opposite sex. Here are some of the standout random connections, By The Numbers:

Number of men who jumped out of a car in traffic to get my number: 1
Number of men encountered on NYC’s #6 subway who asked me out : 2
Number of holiday romances produced by friends’ matchmaking efforts: 2
Number of temp jobs that led to a long-term boyfriend: 1
Number of bridal showers that resulted in being asked out by a groomsman: 1

NYC’s Essex Restaurant: The kiss that resulted from a bridal shower brunch at this Lower East Side eatery was one of the most lackluster I’ve ever had

You never know when or where the next romantic encounter is going to happen. As I recover from my recent foot surgery, I’m excited to be one step closer to finding out what Cupid has in store for me.

Comment » | 6 subway line, By The Numbers, Essex Restaurant, Lower East Side, NYC, random encounters

By The Numbers: You Never Know Edition

October 31st, 2008 — 7:18pm

It’s often said that romance happens when you least expect it. Over the years, I’ve experienced this phenomenon many times.

From NYC’s overcrowded Lexington Avenue subway line to a summer stint as a receptionist, there’s been no shortage of variety when it comes to how I’ve connected with the opposite sex. Here are some of the standout random connections, By The Numbers:

Number of men who jumped out of a car in traffic to get my number: 1
Number of men encountered on NYC’s #6 subway who asked me out : 2
Number of holiday romances produced by friends’ matchmaking efforts: 2
Number of temp jobs that led to a long-term boyfriend: 1
Number of bridal showers that resulted in being asked out by a groomsman: 1

NYC’s Essex Restaurant: The kiss that resulted from a bridal shower brunch at this Lower East Side eatery was one of the most lackluster I’ve ever had

You never know when or where the next romantic encounter is going to happen. As I recover from my recent foot surgery, I’m excited to be one step closer to finding out what Cupid has in store for me.

Comment » | 6 subway line, By The Numbers, Essex Restaurant, Lower East Side, NYC, random encounters

Birthday Trifecta

August 7th, 2008 — 2:40am

Today marks the birthdays of three of my dearest friends – Sara, Steve and Amanda. With two celebrating milestone birthdays (Sara is 35, Amanda is 30), I can’t help reflecting upon the milestones I’ve shared with all of them over the years.

Sara and I met in our student days at Mount Holyoke College, though it was during our junior year in London that we really bonded. From watching the late, lovely Princess Diana flip the switch on Regent Street’s Christmas lights to day trips to Bath and Stonehenge, we truly made the most of our stint in England’s capital. Since then, I’ve watched with pride and awe as Sara has obtained her phD in law and psychology, served as a congressional fellow, appeared on C-Span for her role in drafting the Individuals with Disabilities Education Act and brought her passion for children’s rights to NYC’s Department of Children & Family Services. Her dedication is tireless.

It was also during my time in London that I got to know my British-born buddy Steve. We met in the dinner queue on our first night as residents of Commonwealth Hall, slipping into easy conversation about the dreadful food – a conversation that has continued for 15 wonderful years, with Steve’s wisdom and understanding guiding me through countless twists and turns in life and love. Steve was my greatest champion following a disastrous fling with E, one of our dormmates. I’ll never forget his reaction when I feigned civility toward E during a communal dinner one night.

“That was an Academy Award-winning performance, Darling!”

Just as travel led me to Sara and Steve, so did it acquaint me with fun and fabulous Amanda. We met three summers ago when I invited her on a press junket to Barbados (I work on PR for the Hilton there, she’s a magazine writer who covers travel). We clicked immediately over our shared wanderlust and tales of romance gone awry. Since then, Amanda has inspired me not only with her flair for the written word but her passion for following her dreams — including a year-long journey around the world with friends to be chronicled in a future bestselling book. Visit http://www.lostgirlsworld.blogspot.com/ for more about her amazing journey.

As Amanda, Sara and Steve celebrate their special day, I too feel a cause for celebration — of who they are and the difference each of them has made in my life. Happy, Happy Happy Birthday, my dear friends.

Comment » | Barbados, C-Span, Mount Holyoke, NYC, Princess Diana

Birthday Trifecta

August 6th, 2008 — 9:40pm

Today marks the birthdays of three of my dearest friends – Sara, Steve and Amanda. With two celebrating milestone birthdays (Sara is 35, Amanda is 30), I can’t help reflecting upon the milestones I’ve shared with all of them over the years.

Sara and I met in our student days at Mount Holyoke College, though it was during our junior year in London that we really bonded. From watching the late, lovely Princess Diana flip the switch on Regent Street’s Christmas lights to day trips to Bath and Stonehenge, we truly made the most of our stint in England’s capital. Since then, I’ve watched with pride and awe as Sara has obtained her phD in law and psychology, served as a congressional fellow, appeared on C-Span for her role in drafting the Individuals with Disabilities Education Act and brought her passion for children’s rights to NYC’s Department of Children & Family Services. Her dedication is tireless.

It was also during my time in London that I got to know my British-born buddy Steve. We met in the dinner queue on our first night as residents of Commonwealth Hall, slipping into easy conversation about the dreadful food – a conversation that has continued for 15 wonderful years, with Steve’s wisdom and understanding guiding me through countless twists and turns in life and love. Steve was my greatest champion following a disastrous fling with E, one of our dormmates. I’ll never forget his reaction when I feigned civility toward E during a communal dinner one night.

“That was an Academy Award-winning performance, Darling!”

Just as travel led me to Sara and Steve, so did it acquaint me with fun and fabulous Amanda. We met three summers ago when I invited her on a press junket to Barbados (I work on PR for the Hilton there, she’s a magazine writer who covers travel). We clicked immediately over our shared wanderlust and tales of romance gone awry. Since then, Amanda has inspired me not only with her flair for the written word but her passion for following her dreams — including a year-long journey around the world with friends to be chronicled in a future bestselling book. Visit http://www.lostgirlsworld.blogspot.com/ for more about her amazing journey.

As Amanda, Sara and Steve celebrate their special day, I too feel a cause for celebration — of who they are and the difference each of them has made in my life. Happy, Happy Happy Birthday, my dear friends.

Comment » | Barbados, C-Span, Mount Holyoke, NYC, Princess Diana

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