Category: Twitter


Dating Wisdom From The Twitterverse

July 26th, 2011 — 1:52pm


Now matter how much experience you have (or like to think you have) with dating, sometimes you need a little expert advice. The other day, I turned to the twitterverse for their take on a bachelor’s pre-date actions.

Said bachelor — we’ll call him Mr. Shadowy — and I had gone out a few times a few months ago. Both were drinks-only dates, both ended with kisses goodnight. Mr. Shadowy travels often for business and texted twice from his recent travels. After about a month of radio silence, he unexpectedly resurfaced on Friday with a text message inviting me to drinks and/or a movie.

“We should catch up!!” he exclaimed.

My initial thought was to say no thanks given the lengthy absence of any communication. But, as part of my ongoing attempt to be less jaded and more open minded, I figured, why not? We left it that Mr. Shadowy would call to confirm time and place for date #3 on Monday.

Sure enough, he did get in touch — on Monday via text, at 6:15pm, to suggest drinks. Call me high maintenance, but I think it’s a little inconsiderate to wait until this late in the day to confirm, and then not really have come up with anything concrete in the way of plans. My gut was telling me that Mr. Shadowy was making me his back up plan and/or didn’t care enough to put any thought whatsoever into our date. Either way, I was inclined to cancel. First, though, I decided to do a little informal poll on Twitter.

“Unless they’re KILLER plans (i.e. great seats to Book of Mormon thanks to a lottery),” said relationships guru @DatingRev. “It’s a major fail.”

Added dating coach @RachelTRusso—

“More likely to stay married to his/her career than to you!! I’d just say no and reschedule or scratch it!”

Several tweeps confirmed my suspicions that Mr. Shadowy was either waiting for something (or someone) better to come along, and more than a few said this is standard male behavior.

“Annoying, but happens all the time,” said @SingleGirlie. “Think it’s a guy thing.”

Now married, @DatingRev wasn’t letting his gender off the hook so easily.

“It’s a boy thing – not a man thing. I planned 3-5 days in advance, and confirmed the plans 1-2 days before.”

I couldn’t agree with him more. I’ve been lucky that almost all of the men I’ve ever dated, casual or otherwise, were respectful enough to make and confirm plans much further in advance than two hours before. Which is why, once my gut check was confirmed, I happily told Mr. Shadowy – via text, of course — date #3 was off.

Comment » | dating coaches, dating dos and don'ts, Twitter

Flirting Via Social Media

June 21st, 2011 — 1:56pm

When it comes to connecting through social media, it’s no surprise that flirting is one of  the more popular applications.

Lately, I’ve heard from a handful of random bachelors through Facebook and Twitter. The unfortunate trend I’ve noticed, though, is most of them don’t bother to do their homework first. Unlike guys who reach out through online dating sites, the FB/Twitter crowd rarely attempts to personalize what they write.

Take for example, the 38-year-old Gotham bachelor who messaged me on Facebook without even addressing me by name.

“Hello How Are You Today. Am seeking a woman with good sense of humor understanding and with a caring heart,  for a long term relationship that could lead to marriage..when I hear from you I will tell you more about myself…Meanwhile tell little about yourself.”

I’m all for casting a wide net when searching for love, but sending mass impersonal emails or messages is just bad form. Of course, sometimes even the guys who do a little research first don’t quite know how to articulate that effectively. Here’s what one Texas-based bachelor (a professional writer, no less) tweeted me yesterday:

“I saw your site and you seem to be a ‘professional’ single girl. What I mean is…being single has become your profession.”

Call me oversensitive, but saying that I’m single for a living isn’t exactly a compliment. I’m a writer who happens to blog about being single — writing is my profession, being unattached is simply a part of who I am.

Thankfully, there is the rare, charming guy who gets that effective flirting lies in paying attention to the little things. In my Twitter bio, I mention a love for 80’s music. This prompted an adorable Ohio native to tweet me about his affection for music of that era.

“I’m the 80’s music king…awesome trivia shall come later..”

Sure enough, Mr. Ohio has sent along some playful trivia questions that have tested the limits of my 80’s knowledge — and opened the door to easy banter.

“You know I would walk to nyc if I knew love was there…lol.”

A romantic with a sense of humor who can articulate all of that in 140 characters or less? Sounds like my kind of guy.

1 comment » | Facebook, online flirting, Twitter

Love Lessons From A Former Serial Monogamist

December 12th, 2010 — 1:59pm

Thursday, I met up with JP, a Twitter follower of mine and Alabama-based thirtysomething married dad of three. JP had read about my Dating Blitz across the US this spring and offered to share his take on finding love.

The Bar Room: JP and I met up at this lively Midtown spot in NYC’s Museum of Modern Art

Over drinks at MoMa, JP admitted he was a moderate serial monogamist before settling down at the age of 28. Once he felt ready for marriage, he was single minded about it.

“I wouldn’t go out with someone because I was looking for the right person and decided they couldn’t be the one,” he said.

If he could go back and talk to his single self, JP says he would tell him to give people a chance and not rush into labeling someone as not a match. He also recommends doing activities without the intent of making a connection — but being always remaining open to it happening.

We talked a lot about first dates. I mentioned my disdain for “what do you do?” being the default go-to question. JP suggests asking something unexpected instead. For example–

“If you could do anything you want for a living that’s the complete opposite of what you do now, what would it be?”

Now 36, JP has learned how important communication and true partnership are to making a marriage work. As a lawyer, he says it would be easy for him to go into cross-examination mode during an argument — but he doesn’t because a committed relationship deserves better than that. It also requires being giving up a certain amount of independence for the sake of building something together.

Along with sharing his insights about love, JP told me that most of his friends are married — happily so. I couldn’t help thinking about something which came up time and again on my Dating Blitz journey, that people outside of New York are generally wired to leave singlehood behind much sooner than they do here. Which is one big reason why 2011 could be the year I leave Gotham behind for somewhere else.

1 comment » | Midtown NYC, moving out of your hometown, The Great Dating Blitz, Twitter

The Downside of Virtual Flirting

December 1st, 2009 — 12:40am

When you’re single, social networking often takes on a whole new dimension — as I discovered not too long ago with a brief Twitter flirtation.

It began with a direct message from Tom, one of my Twitter followers and a Connecticut-based fellow PR practitioner. Our conversation moved quickly from business practices in a down economy to playful banter.

Referencing my Twitter bio, which mentions a previous stint in broadcast news, Tom said —

“Well, you’re TV gorgeous.”

A few more direct messages and texts later, we were sharing favorite cocktails and planning to get together in person. Tom asked me when I was Connecticut-bound, and I countered with asking when he was coming to the city.

“Whenever you say yes to letting me buy you drinks,” he replied.

Though our e-flirting didn’t end up materializing into a date, I couldn’t help thinking about how the Internet, text messaging and the like have become a double-edged sword when it comes to romance.

For as much as technology makes it easier to interact with new people, it also makes truly connecting more difficult — because it has overtaken traditional methods of communication like ye old telephone.

Whatever happened to the ritual of extending a date invitation by phone? Or following up after a great date with an actual conversation instead of a text message? You can say a lot more by using your voice than you can with your Blackberry.

Which is why I’m happy to skip the virtual flirting in favor of making connections through more old fashioned means — speed dating.

Comment » | Blackberry, calling instead of emailing or texting, online flirting, speed dating, Twitter

The Downside of Virtual Flirting

November 30th, 2009 — 7:40pm

When you’re single, social networking often takes on a whole new dimension — as I discovered not too long ago with a brief Twitter flirtation.

It began with a direct message from Tom, one of my Twitter followers and a Connecticut-based fellow PR practitioner. Our conversation moved quickly from business practices in a down economy to playful banter.

Referencing my Twitter bio, which mentions a previous stint in broadcast news, Tom said —

“Well, you’re TV gorgeous.”

A few more direct messages and texts later, we were sharing favorite cocktails and planning to get together in person. Tom asked me when I was Connecticut-bound, and I countered with asking when he was coming to the city.

“Whenever you say yes to letting me buy you drinks,” he replied.

Though our e-flirting didn’t end up materializing into a date, I couldn’t help thinking about how the Internet, text messaging and the like have become a double-edged sword when it comes to romance.

For as much as technology makes it easier to interact with new people, it also makes truly connecting more difficult — because it has overtaken traditional methods of communication like ye old telephone.

Whatever happened to the ritual of extending a date invitation by phone? Or following up after a great date with an actual conversation instead of a text message? You can say a lot more by using your voice than you can with your Blackberry.

Which is why I’m happy to skip the virtual flirting in favor of making connections through more old fashioned means — speed dating.

Comment » | Blackberry, calling instead of emailing or texting, online flirting, speed dating, Twitter

Another Great First Date…To Nowhere

November 13th, 2009 — 10:55pm

Tuesday night, I enjoyed another fabulous first date with a guy that I met at HurryDate – one that has me rethinking my approach to dating in NYC.

Bombay-born Taz and I met up at the swanky Chambers Hotel in Midtown for drinks. We settled into a cozy corner of the upstairs bar (complete with a sofa and hardcover coffee table books), where the conversation was as smooth as the service and menu selections.

The Chambers Hotel: A great date spot

Over cocktails, yummy appetizers and – unexpectedly – milk and cookies, Taz and I found plenty to talk about. Along with the usual first date subjects of career, travel and hobbies, we chatted about U2’s brilliant shows at Giants Stadium and the merits of speed dating versus online dating, i.e., less time wasted on interminable back and forth.

Though we lingered until closing time, neither of us wanted to call it a night so we walked a few blocks to Papillon, an inviting bistro and bar.

Finally, after nearly four hours of effortless conversation and playful teasing, it was time to say goodnight. Taz leaned in for a quick kiss before taking off.

He texted me the next day to say what a great time he had. And, much like fellow HurryDater John, that’s the last I heard from him.

Having gone on two great first dates to nowhere in a row now, I can’t help thinking about the lopsided female-male ratio here. And how it breeds a plenty-of-fish mindset among NYC men – especially among those who belong to the thirtysomething age bracket.

I’m also thinking that I had it right in my early twenties when I dated older men. It’s time to up the age ante and go for the fortysomething bachelors.

Coming up…my first Twitter flirtation and another HurryDate date.

5 comments » | Chambers hotel, first dates, HurryDate, Midtown NYC, online dating, Papillon bistro, speed dating, Twitter

Another Great First Date…To Nowhere

November 13th, 2009 — 5:55pm

Tuesday night, I enjoyed another fabulous first date with a guy that I met at HurryDate – one that has me rethinking my approach to dating in NYC.

Bombay-born Taz and I met up at the swanky Chambers Hotel in Midtown for drinks. We settled into a cozy corner of the upstairs bar (complete with a sofa and hardcover coffee table books), where the conversation was as smooth as the service and menu selections.

The Chambers Hotel: A great date spot

Over cocktails, yummy appetizers and – unexpectedly – milk and cookies, Taz and I found plenty to talk about. Along with the usual first date subjects of career, travel and hobbies, we chatted about U2’s brilliant shows at Giants Stadium and the merits of speed dating versus online dating, i.e., less time wasted on interminable back and forth.

Though we lingered until closing time, neither of us wanted to call it a night so we walked a few blocks to Papillon, an inviting bistro and bar.

Finally, after nearly four hours of effortless conversation and playful teasing, it was time to say goodnight. Taz leaned in for a quick kiss before taking off.

He texted me the next day to say what a great time he had. And, much like fellow HurryDater John, that’s the last I heard from him.

Having gone on two great first dates to nowhere in a row now, I can’t help thinking about the lopsided female-male ratio here. And how it breeds a plenty-of-fish mindset among NYC men – especially among those who belong to the thirtysomething age bracket.

I’m also thinking that I had it right in my early twenties when I dated older men. It’s time to up the age ante and go for the fortysomething bachelors.

Coming up…my first Twitter flirtation and another HurryDate date.

5 comments » | Chambers hotel, first dates, HurryDate, Midtown NYC, online dating, Papillon bistro, speed dating, Twitter

Up Close With Lauren Luke

August 4th, 2009 — 11:20pm

Thursday, I headed over to Sephora’s brand-new location in Times Square for the U.S. launch of Lauren Luke’s new makeup kits.

With her wildly popular makeup tutorial videos on YouTube — broadcast from a webcam in her bedroom — Lauren has become an international sensation beloved by her fans for her sense of humor and down-to-earth personality.

Meeting Miss Luke: Lauren and me at her Sephora debut

After an inspiring video about her rise to fame (that included a meet and greet with Queen Elizabeth), I had the pleasure of chatting with the 27-year-old England-born single mom. Soft spoken and absolutely charming, Lauren said she first fell in love with cosmetics as a teen. Her top beauty inspirations — Megan Fox and Deeta Von Teese.

Even with her phenomenal success, Lauren remains approachable and fully connected to her thousands of followers via Facebook, MySpace and Twitter. She’s an awesome example of what can happen when true passion and talent intersect with the power of social media.

Lauren has developed five fabulous makeup kits that you can order here. Sephora will launch the kits nationwide across 135 stores next month.

Comment » | Facebook, Lauren Luke, makeup advice, new Sephora in Times Square, Twitter, viral marketing, YouTube

Up Close With Lauren Luke

August 4th, 2009 — 6:20pm

Thursday, I headed over to Sephora’s brand-new location in Times Square for the U.S. launch of Lauren Luke’s new makeup kits.

With her wildly popular makeup tutorial videos on YouTube — broadcast from a webcam in her bedroom — Lauren has become an international sensation beloved by her fans for her sense of humor and down-to-earth personality.

Meeting Miss Luke: Lauren and me at her Sephora debut

After an inspiring video about her rise to fame (that included a meet and greet with Queen Elizabeth), I had the pleasure of chatting with the 27-year-old England-born single mom. Soft spoken and absolutely charming, Lauren said she first fell in love with cosmetics as a teen. Her top beauty inspirations — Megan Fox and Deeta Von Teese.

Even with her phenomenal success, Lauren remains approachable and fully connected to her thousands of followers via Facebook, MySpace and Twitter. She’s an awesome example of what can happen when true passion and talent intersect with the power of social media.

Lauren has developed five fabulous makeup kits that you can order here. Sephora will launch the kits nationwide across 135 stores next month.

Comment » | Facebook, Lauren Luke, makeup advice, new Sephora in Times Square, Twitter, viral marketing, YouTube

Friday Fun On The LES: Part One

March 22nd, 2009 — 9:45pm
Friday night, I headed down to the Lower East Side for a big night out in honor of my colleague Katie and her imminent move to Connecticut.

The evening began over a delicious dinner at Japanese eatery Jeollado with work galpals Caroline and Morgan. We shared edamame and two tall orders of hot sake — and some of the tastiest, cheapest sushi I’ve enjoyed in awhile. With rolls as inexpensive as $3, Jeollado is a low key, budget-friendly treat. My personal favorites were the golden dragon eel roll and the Lisa roll (salmon, tuna, yellowtail).

From Jeollado, we walked over to the three-bedroom pad Katie shares with roommates Beth and Jon.

Three’s Company: (from left to right) Katie, Beth and Jon strike a pose during Friday’s LES festivities

The party was already in high gear when we arrived, thanks to friends and significant others (including Katie’s longtime love and absolute sweetheart, Connor), amped up music and a great spread (wine and cheese, Beth’s homemade brownies, chips and dip, etc.).

In the blast from the past department, I was floored when the door opened and in walked Cole, a classmate from my journalism school days at Columbia University who I hadn’t seen in ten years. We fell into easy conversation, as she filled me in on her long distance beau in California and her producing gig at “Good Morning America.”

I was happy to hear the on-air talent at my favorite newsmagazine show is just as much fun behind the scenes. And yes, for a moment, I felt a bit wistful about my previous life in the crazy but exhilarating world of TV news.

Turning my attention back to the present, I chatted with Jon, who’s every bit as smart, adorable and fun as Katie had said he was. We talked about travel — like me, he’s lived in London — food, and mechanical bulls. I admitted my anxiety about riding the bull at Mason Dixon’s later that night. Having already Twittered my plans, though, I knew there was no turning back.

Up next…part two of my wild night downtown and a surprisingly great Saturday date.

3 comments » | Columbia University, Good Morning America, Jeollado, journalism school, London, Lower East Side, mechanical bull rides, Twitter

Back to top